January 5, 2009
My mom came here for 2 weeks and I feel “awkward” (a word that I had no idea how much I used until she came, or I should say how many instances in my life call for the use of the word) writing about her visit since she’s really the only one who reads my electronic journal (again, still resisting “blog”) on a regular basis. [I’m trying to get her to write a guest entry on here, so if you can, push her to write it!]
I would like to send out a blanket “Happy happy!” to everyone, which is how Anglophones (English speakers) here say “Happy New Year” (maybe combining “happy x-mas” and “happy New Year” together?). I spent this Christmas listening to holiday tunes that did not seem to fit with the palm trees and sunlight streaming in through the lace curtains and doing some crafts (I would like to show amazement at the ingenuity of my mom for picking up corn husks off the ground and whisking them into delicate, curled angel ornaments… although now my boss wants me to teach the female population of Buea how to do it and I’m feeling a bit over my head for that…). We made delicious foods and thoroughly enjoyed playing “Things” (a game of fun randomness that can be played with anyone as was demonstrated at New Year’s…) For New Year’s we had quite a mix of different cultures celebrating with some guacamole, homemade bread (which, horrors of horrors, was made with flour that was stored near mothballs and had a most awful chemical flavor: welcome to Cameroon!), rice pudding, among others. We played “Things” again, which is fascinating classifying Cameroonian vs. German vs. American responses.
We traveled to Bamenda and I remembered my anxious fretting when I first came to this country, my extreme frustration at travel in Cameroon. The waiting was so unnecessary and without an end in sight. But now I expect the endlessness and sort of just zone out. I also realized that I sort of remove myself, and that isn’t a problem because I think the Peace Corps kids I travel with don’t notice/do the same thing.
But upon reaching Bamenda (which I hold in my mind as sort of this expansive little Anglophone paradise with crafts nestled in the valley), it was made clear that perhaps I knew of less activities than I thought. So after harvesting all the crafts made for white people possible (I feel pretty confident that I’ve never seen a Cameroonian blowing on a whistle carved to look like a bird or using trivets woven of raffia), we looked around and said, “And?” Luckily my mom shares my passion for pagne (and why is it that after more than a year I never noticed that Anglophones don’t really understand me when I say this word??) or African fabric. We found the section of the market with row after row of patterned goodness (complete with missionary’s wife buying her stock) and have officially purchased enough to clothe an entire stylish army. Although I think I may have heard growing up, “Eat your broccoli, there are people starving in Africa,” I somehow doubt I’ve heard, “Put your clothes on! There are naked people in Africa without any clothes to wear!” And that is because there is an abundance of fantastic options.
People meeting my mom kept looking over to me and saying, “Wow! Your mom is so young and healthy!” I’m not sure what they expected, but I think I might like to be greeted in such a fashion throughout my life everywhere I go – so take note, all those who may be involved in greeting me in the future, Jess should be remarked upon her youth and healthiness.
We took the night bus back from Bamenda, which was my first time. I was a bit afraid of bandits, but who isn’t? Ya just gotta get out there and brave ‘em. And boy was it sweet! We waited around the bus station for awhile, with not much in the way of seating options since the entire place has been thoroughly dusted during the day with swirling red dust (don’t ya know the Harmattan is upon us?). I had to pee, which is a good time in the bathroom there. Most places in Cameroon charge extra for… #2 in public bathrooms. (see Things That Would Not Happen in America) But Bamenda labels the bathrooms, “Urinate” and “Toilet 1, 2, 3…” so you know who’s doing what in this little reeking dim hut. Why don’t they charge you to pee? Because all you get is a shower drain. That’s by far some minimal facilities if I’ve ever seen any.
Anyway, the night bus. What’s great about it is that it’s cooler since it’s nighttime (and Cameroonians can’t really be relied on to open windows due to beliefs about getting sick from too much air, being really cold-natured, etc.) and they don’t pack the bus as full of bodies (I’m not sure why…). We got some sort of crappy seats (one of us had to sit in the shorter folding seat), but in the beginning I let dear old mom sit in the cushy seat. She’d brought her neck pillow, so she was dozing pronto. Meanwhile, I was dodging the leaning of the guy on the other side of me who woke up and asked where we were and what music I was listening to. Grrreat. At this point I had about another 4-7 hours (one never knows) left and I was nowhere near sleeping. We stopped for a bathroom break and mom urged me to take the better seat. Being the spoiled brat I am, I hopped in. And she nudged the pillow under my head just in time for me to be out like a light until we reached Buea. Unfortunately she’d been counting down the hours while I was living it up in my private Hilton hotel (are there nicer hotels than the Hilton? Not in the capital of Cameroon there ain’t!).
I try to be aware of every time I write “Cameroonians” since I don’t want to seem like I group the entire nation into a category of window-closing non-whistle-blowers, etc. Although I do see general trends, I don’t want to set up the dichotomy between “white people” (who aren’t even all white, I do recognize how racist I’ve become after hearing “whiteman” refer to all Westerners for over a year) and Cameroonians. That being said, I was really impressed with the reception of most people to my mom. Everyone was really welcoming and happy to have her. They made great food (while I didn’t get a chance to make her try okra soup, which in its sticky, soupy glory is by far the most revolting of consistencies to Americans… but it’s tasty!).
I’m still sitting in my rut of “half-way” point (although I’m peering over the top of the roller coaster to the soaring free fall of my last year) and it’s still not pretty. Today I read an article about a Buddhist marriage and realized that I’m essentially living the example of the unexamined life. I was excited enough about joining Peace Corps to take me through the first year; I remember saying things like, “How can one ever really know if you’re helping? But my time isn’t so valuable that I feel like it’s a waste to do what I’m doing.” While I still find that to be true, I don’t have the energy to go out and do something that doesn’t seem to be doing anything for anyone. I even left compassion in my suitcase, graciously assuming that I even brought it with me to Cameroon. I certainly haven’t been using it very often. The Buddhist article talked about trying to pull a cow of the mud and in order to do it, you’ve got to find a perch or you’ll be in the mud too. But even if you don’t pull the cow out, it’s still valid that you sit with the cow through the suffering and that you show compassion. So, Jess, if you can’t pull Cameroonians out of the mud, at LEAST show compassion (not to liken Cameroonians to cows, which would offend a great number of Americans). So this is my goal for January: until I find a perch, at least being with people through their experiences is something accomplished.
This morning I finally went “for sport” after a long lazy time. I started walking briskly up the hill when I caught up to an older man walking (in a vertical striped shirt and bright shorts with red and white striped socks, he was like a cartoon). As a general rule, I wear headphones to ignore people talking to me. I don’t need to talk to the car washing guy who calls me baby, or the welder who says, “Hello! Hi! Hello?” I don’t want to wish everyone I walk past “good morning,” I just want to do my sport. But as I passed this guy, he said “You’re fast! You’re so strong!” I laughed saying, “Thanks!” and he soon jogged past me saying, “I can’t let you beat me.” Usually I don’t see anyone jogging/running on my walks, since Cameroonians like to do their sport on the soccer field. And the few people I do see are running, since they’re training for the mountain race. So this guy was an unusual amusement. Each time I got close to passing him, he’d start jogging again. Eventually he tuckered out of the game and as I walked in front of him, he justified his failure by telling me that he’d started out at Mile 17 (at the VERY bottom of the HUGE hill, whereas I’d started up about ¾ of where he began) and I called out, “Oh! Well, that’s it then! I’ve only just started!” as I power-walked my way up. Glad to know I’m inspiring people in small ways.
Since my mom was here, I got lazy (hence the lack of exercise) and didn’t want to wash laundry. That’s kicking me in the rear end now that the clothes are spilling into my room. So my clever tactic? Wash only the “innerwears” which makes me feel like I’ve done something and I’ve got enough other clothes that I can handle it. I hung them in the “laundry room”, since I don’t like my neighbors staring at pair after pair of my undies, but there aren’t any curtains on that room so it’s basically a vacant, glaring room, filled with my unmentionables. For those of you with access to a washing machine: live it up! What an AMAZING invention that was. (Curtains are also pretty cool too though…)
I just finished reading Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Kingsolver. Now, I’m relatively on the hippier end of life at this point with the baby dreads, Peace Corps, tea tree oil products, non-red meat eating, etc. But this book was really inspiring. I doubt I’ll ever really live on a farm but the idea of trying to eat locally and support yourself as much as possible for a year is challenging but Kingsolver does a great job of not making it boring or snooty-sounding – even when she goes to Italy (see my review of Gilbert’s Eat Love Pray). I would like to be more food-conscious, as in where everything comes from and the energy it’s taken to get it to my plate. Which pushes me to take more advantage of all the locally-grown produce I have access to now. So while lamenting the lack of washing machine, I do have local pineapples, bananas, avocados, tomatoes (allll the time), and papayas. More than that, I often know the growers. So, eat that, you hot-water having, movie-theater going, internet-in-the-house using Americans!
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